Welcome to my very own Blog

For those of you lucky few individuals that are going to be able to claim that you were there at the genesis of something great, I welcome you. For everyone else that will be reading this after I make it big, I welcome you anyway. (Heck, I don't think it's a wise marketing decision to alienate roughly 100% of my potential readers.) I know I am a little late getting into the blog craze, but since I am trying to start a writing career, I figured, what do I have to lose? If I am going to write, I may as well do it in a public forum and start handling the criticism, right?

'Eclectic' is a Life Philosophy here at Chez Llanes. I have a ton of thoughts and life experiences that might make you laugh - or they might bore you to tears. Either way, I welcome you to weigh in with your comments on any topic I might write about. This is not rocket science, and I will try not to turn it into anything nearly that complicated.

Right now, it is almost 5pm here in Houston, Texas. I am sitting at my cubicle on the 10th floor of a building in the Galleria (one of the glitziest malls in the country), with a window view of the world outside. Most everyone is going home right about now, but alas! I have to stay here until 6pm, and on a Friday, no less! Try THAT, Ted Ferguson, Bud Light Stuntman!! Two full minutes after 5pm is child's play around here!

Of course, on the bright side, I am missing most of the traffic that piles up in the area at about this time. Now, for those of you outside of the Houston Metropolitan Area, let me explain what "traffic" means here. I have long held that drivers here in Houston are the worst in the nation. Until recently, I have had only my conviction and my scars to prove it. Now, the city's very own Metropolitan Transit Authority can back me up.

On January 1, 2004, Houston Light Rail officially began service in the downtown area. At the time it went on-line, there were already four accidents on record, all occuring during the irregularly scheduled but well publicized test runs during the months of November and December, 2003. Since that time, METRO has logged 126 accidents. That is an average of one incident every 6 days, compared to the national average of four incidents per year! No other rail system in the nation can boast our numbers.

Most people seem to blame Metro for these numbers. Organizations such as ActionAmerica.org insist that the Light Rail is dangerous, badly designed, and a failure. I believe that the train is fine, it's the drivers around the train that are the real menace! You see, here in Houston, unlike anywhere else in the country, almost the entire 8 mile length of the Light Rail runs on the street, sharing space with the cars driving through downtown and the surrounding areas. And consistently, most of the accidents that have been logged (and videotaped, and witnessed!) have been caused by driver error!! Illegal turns, failure to yield, failure to control speed, ignoring posted signs and lights - the list goes on. THE TRAIN IS ON RAILS, FOR PETE'S SAKE! It's not going to swerve, or cut you off, and except for starting and stopping, it hardly varies in speed. It is also HUGE!! Can you not SEE it coming? For crying out loud! Opponents of Light Rail: have you actually experienced Houston drivers? Have you seen how crazy this multi-ethnic blend of driving habits is? I have experienced traffic in places like New York and Mexico City, and nothing matches the sheer audacity and ignorance of the Houston driver. To blame the train for the high rate of accidents is like blaming the campfire for burning the child! How inane is that?

I guess the point I am trying to make is that traffic around here sucks. There is no courtesy here, and little things like using blinkers and looking before you change lanes are ignored. Toss in the fact that, because of how sprawling this city is, EVERYBODY has a car. Sprinkle in a dose of inadequate public transportation infrastructure. Stir in an overworked and undersized police department. Voila! Is the recipe starting to take shape yet? It's called Disaster.

Commuting is a fact of life here in Houston. Commuting does not involve busses or trains. It means driving a car. When rush hours routinely last three to four hours, it is time for a meaningful change.

Now, if y'all will excuse me, it is time to leave the office, jump into my car and drive home. Hopefully I've rambled on long enough that I will have missed most of tonight's traffic! Wish me luck!

Once more unto the breach, dear friends, once more,
Or close the wall up with our Houston traffic dead!
At home there's nothing so becomes a man
As modest stillness and humility;
But when the blast of car horns blow in our ears,
Then imitate the action of the tiger:
Stiffen the sinews, summon up the blood.


[A huge thanks to Bill Shakespeare for graciously allowing me to paraphrase "Henry V" (5.3.44-51)]